Shake hands with life

Aug 20, 2010, 12.00am IST
Aruna Jethwani.

Every body is floating in a vacuum, so to speak. Or, they're living on a surface. We are strangers to our own self. The world around us, glorifying glamour, celebrating the superfluous and taken up with virtual images, has become so disconnected. When one reads of a celebrity or student taking her own life, it makes me wonder, why would anyone wish to end what is essentially a beautiful life?


Loss of face, depression, weakness and fear of rejection by family and society are some of the reasons for dejection. All these point to one thing: lack of faith and stunted self growth.

Says Dada J PVaswani, "Depression is not what happens to us. It is due to what happens in us." However it is failures and difficulties that make life so interesting, he points out. It is unrealistic to accept success and profit all the time; it is foolhardy to consider life as nothing but a series of problems. "Learn to live life as it is. Bend and you will not break!" advises Dada.

During a crisis we do need emotional support from family and friends; but if such support is not available for some reason, it is necessary to find it within. Inner resource will help us detach ourselves from the maya of illusion. Remember the saying: 'This too shall pass away.'

Scientist and inventor Thomas Edison once remarked, "There is great value in disaster." It is true that disappointments, pain and suffering have made life difficult for many of us – but surviving those against all odds has also made heroes out of us. Like a tea bag, we tend to become stronger when in hot water. "For every hurt, for every plight,/ For every lonely pain racked night./ There is a reason. / But if we trust the Lord, as we should,/ It all will work out for our good./ He knows the reason."

There is a deeper meaning in life which is not seen immediately; it gets revealed slowly, later in life. But impatient as we are, we cannot wait – in our haste we forget to live and so we lose touch with our inner self that could have given us immense strength.

Insecurity grows by leaps due to lack of trust, and that hinders bonding and so leads to absence of true emotional support. Add to this the excess of material values, which makes an individual self-conscious of his weaknesses. He suffers then from low self-esteem. If only we could tap into our inner source, we would get empowered to face all odds. That is why it is so important to make the effort to shake hands with life; then it will meet us halfway.


Unfortunately, fear of failure haunts most people. We sail in the same boat. We seek support and security in a relationship, in materialistic risk coverage, in money, and friends. But the basic insecurity lies within. It can be transformed only with faith; by mental and spiritual exercises.


Perhaps the educational system should incorporate a curriculum of courage-giving courses to increase an individual's spiritual quotient. Half an hour of yoga, meditation, and storytelling of heroes and great souls and such inspirational talk would go a long way in making youth strong and courageous. And to face the challenges at the ground level, let schools and colleges make it obligatory for students to do social service to the less privileged. Let's meet life halfway at least.